This blog is about to take a little twist. As of now I post a little something every now and then. Well, I’ve decided that I’m going to be using it more often. Here is a little bit more about me:
I am 24 years old. From my last post you can see that I am very proud of the time I served in the Air Force. While i was in the Air Force I hurt my back and now have degenerative disk disease and bulging disks…at 24. What does this mean? Pain. Lots and lots of pain. I have been in pain since April of 2006. It’s been over 3 years.
You’re probably wondering why the VA doesn’t take care of this. They do in their own slow, drawn out way. They send me a check every month and I can go to a VA clinic or hospital to get medical care. My last doctor sent me to physical therapy (my second attempt at getting relief from this treatment). Obviously that didn’t work. They tried electronic stimulation. That did a whole lot of nothing. Two months ago they finally prescribed me muscle relaxers. They relax me and make me a little drowsy and pretty out of it, but I still feel the pain. Next up was vicodin. I still feel the pain. Pain. Lots and lots of pain.
I got a new primary care doctor and he genuinely seems to care. He ordered new tests for a re-evaluation. He’s the one who prescribed me the muscle relaxers and vicodin. He’s the first doctor to do that since I completed my term on active duty in 2007. Every other doctor told me to take an anti-inflammatory and call it a day. Pain.
Tomorrow I begin a new method of treatment. I go for my first epidural. I have to admit I’m a little scared. The thought of a big needle sticking straight into my spine while I’m awake and trying to lay as still as I can. I looked it up on-line so I know more of what to expect. Normal side effects are headaches. Well, I already get migraines so a headache should be a piece of cake. Then I saw that they only have a 50% success rate at relieving SOME pain. That makes me more nervous.
The whole thing is scary. My whole life has changed. I am not allowed to run. Ever. The saying “I run when chased” is a perfect description of how it is. I used to run when I got stressed out or just needed to get away for an hour. I like to run. I liked to hook up my iPod and hit the open road. Now it hurts to walk. I’m scared of things people my age shouldn’t have to worry about. When am I going to be in a wheelchair? Will I be able to carry a child? OK, that’s enough wining.
So, that’s where I am today. Scared and in pain and hoping praying that tomorrows procedure helps me.
“I feel like one of those people who is so miserable that they can’t be around normal people, like I’ll infect the happy people” grey’s anatomy
